Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Just need to get this out of my system

Just bear with me on this one, folks. I simply need to talk a minute. If you don't want to listen, it's OK.

Let me begin my saying that I feel guilty about even mentioning my migraines. So many people are dealing with much, much more serious, terminal diseases and illnesses -- cancer, Alzheimer's, dementia, depression, heart trouble, you name it. But, as one of my doctors says, I have chronic, everyday pain, which is no acceptable lifestyle.

You feel lonely, isolated, helpless, worried, miserable, motionless, mad. And, please forgive my language, you simply feel like shit.

Good news is that one of the best medical professionals and human beings I have ever known has taken a special interest in my case. I'm a guinea pig for a new treatment. It's helping kill the migraines. Following treatment two sessions ago, I went five days without one, which for me is an eternity. He and his family will never know how grateful to and thankful for them I feel.

You don't understand if you've never had one. And I hope you never have and never will have one. You can't do anything. You can't move sometimes. About all you can do is lie in a cool, dark room. If I'm lucky, I can listen to Bing Crosby. The timbre of his voice doesn't make my head hurt. Go figure.

I've tried nearly everything but Botox injections. My insurance won't pay for them. I worry -- about my performance, my ability to work on projects, my quality of life. I'll tell you this: you certainly find out who your true friends and loved ones are when you get sick.

As John Denver sang, in another generation about another, more life-threatening, set of circumstances, "I want to live. I want to grow. I want to see. I want to know. I want to share what I can give. I wanna be. I want to live."

So, even though it's much, much, much lower on the priority list than those with terminal illnesses, think about your buddy Jake, if you would, or send up a prayer if you're of such a persuasion.

If I can be vulnerable a minute, it's tough. What's that Dave Loggins line?

But, of all the dreams I've lost or found, and all that I ain't got
I still need a name or two; somebody I can sing to...

Chances are, if you made it this far, you're a special person with a good heart. And, for that, I thank you.

Have a great afternoon. Love you.

2 Comments:

Blogger Lola Alapo said...

I did read all the way to the end, actually. :)
I'm sorry for the trials you've been through, friend. Never feel guilty when you ask people to pray for you. Praying for others is part of what community is about, no?
Take care! And I do pray for you.

3:38 PM  
Blogger Misty Williams said...

Thanks for putting this on her my friend... Will be praying for you my friend!!! :)

4:13 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home