Get a life

OK, enough's enough. I mean, really, this is insane. It's enough to make you pack up, take a cruise, visit some place warm, forget the bad side of Christmas altogether.

I don't know what you were doing at 4 a.m. I was sleeping, nursing a persistent cold. But apparently three women were running with carts from one of the big children's stores in town, having scarfed up whatever one buys at 4 in the morning.

Folks were already parking on the outskirts of Knoxville Center Mall by dawn. Not to make a quick getaway. But because there wasn't anywhere to park.

You can't make this up.

Our society began slouching toward a materialistic Gomorrah years and years ago. This isn't something new. Black Friday has more or less become a holiday tradition, sad to say.

But 4 a.m.? You gotta be kidding. If there ever comes a day when I feel like I need to be up at 4 a.m. to buy something, shoot me, throw me in the casket and smack the coffin on its way down into the ground.

I'm too disgusted to say more. Except this: Stay at home next year, morons. Fix your family breakfast. Take a walk together. Plan an outing. Cuddle up to that someone special.

Or, here's a thought. Just stay in bed.

And get a life while you're at it.